与忒绿、林木同译一首诗 Riddle
RiddleRichard Wilbur
Where far in forest I am laid,
In a place ringed around by stones,
Look for no melancholy shade,
And have no thoughts of buried bones;
For I am bodiless and bright,
And fill this glade with sudden glow;
The leaves are washed in under-light;
Shade lies upon the boughs like snow.
谜
我被安葬于密林深处
周围有石头环绕
不要寻找忧郁的树荫
也不要想念地下的尸骨
因为我已化为无形的明亮
骤然闪耀在林间空地
低处的光芒洗濯着树叶
暗影像雪一样覆在树枝上
再读读,有点啰嗦呀~:P 就是不一样,一开始就不一样,在你这里已经埋到地下了,太狠了点~但是好译
荔荔 发表于 2024-4-18 17:20
再读读,有点啰嗦呀~
不觉得,每行都比原文短~ 林木 发表于 2024-4-18 19:56
就是不一样,一开始就不一样,在你这里已经埋到地下了,太狠了点~但是好译
我也把laid理解成“安放”,联系后面的“尸骨”,就直接译成“安葬”了。仅仅因为喜欢这样,是否任性了点呢~ 而且对整首诗的理解,作者到底想传递什么,还未达到忒绿的高度~
诗人们都 read too much into it :)
This's just a riddle written in verses.
The answer has nothing to do with life or death, body or soul.
It's a thing that we're very familiar with.
If you know the answer, you will find this riddle is quite funny.
翻译成这样, 不能读英文的人就怎么也猜不出来了:)
Solving a riddle often requires to use your intuition. 无主题 发表于 2024-4-19 02:09
诗人们都 read too much into it
This's just a riddle written in verses.
The answer has nothing ...
额,,,又是一种解读。
避免与忒绿和林木重合,我翻译成这样了。忒绿的有韵脚,林木的有汉语节奏感,我的无韵脚且无节奏感~;P 荔荔 发表于 2024-4-18 21:36
而且对整首诗的理解,作者到底想传递什么,还未达到忒绿的高度~
诗人可以满意了,把谜写成了谜~
无主题 发表于 2024-4-19 02:09
诗人们都 read too much into it
This's just a riddle written in verses.
The answer has nothing ...
The answer has nothing to do with life or death, body or soul. 解谜高手,but are you so sure? 一首诗的妙处正在于留下空间,不同读者有不同解读.